Lighten Up To Get More Love

Plenty of us (in fact, probably most of us) have stressful lives. For one reason or another – from finances to pressures at work, health concerns to unfinished projects – most people have things that keep them on edge.

These are the things that keep us awake at night, that worm their way into our thoughts and turn good moods sour… It’s what drives our sense of perpetual responsibility – that we need to get stuff done, be productive, be “adult,” and well, make us less than patient for the things we deem frivolous, silly, or “immature.”

It will help your marriage if you and your spouse can lighten up!
It will help your marriage if you and your spouse can lighten up!

While some of these are just facts of life, we don’t need to be so serious all the time!

Stress and “adulthood” don’t have to make us sticks in the mud, too concerned about status and responsibility to cut loose, too worried about how others perceive us to act goofy or risk a little embarrassment… Especially around a spouse!

In fact, having fun, making each other laugh, and being generally lighthearted can do wonders for all of those “serious” parts of your life, especially the overall quality of your marriage!

A recent study published on Science Daily says, “People who spent more time laughing with their partner felt they were more similar to their partner. They had this overlapping sense of self with the other person. We also found that the more people laughed with their romantic partner, the more they felt they were supported by that person.”

How’s that for a reason to embrace your sense of humor?

When you don’t take yourself so seriously, you can both shrug off some of the stressors you face and find joy in simple things. You can do something silly just to make your spouse laugh without feeling embarrassed or that you’re being “too childish.”

This also extends into the activities you can do together as a couple. Don’t worry about what anyone else might think, and just have fun with the person you love! Go mini golfing, ride go-karts, see silly kid’s movies, goof around in a costume store, do whatever makes you laugh and feel good – and it will help your relationship flourish.

This isn’t to say that you should shirk your responsibilities or crack jokes in every situation. Seriousness can have its place – but you’ve got to make room for some silly stuff too! You’ll be amazed how lighthearted, fun interactions can help you feel attracted to each other, how it can fight off feelings of boredom in the marriage, and rekindle other areas of communication, affection, and the desire to spend time together.

Every interaction you have with each other sets the stage for the next – and the more often those interactions are filled with smiles and laughter, the more you’ll come to expect (even subconsciously) a positive experience when spending time with your partner.

Make a point to bring some laughter into your relationship, even if it’s just a little bit at a time. Tell some jokes, embrace your goofy side, do silly things to get a smile out of your spouse. It will help relieve the stresses you face in many areas of your life, as well as pull you and your spouse closer and closer together. Give it a try today!

For more advice on how to strengthen your marriage, check out the StrongMarriageNow System today!
Dr. Dana Fillmore and Amy Barnhart, co-Founders,

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