The people who stay happily married are willing to work on it. They’re willing to learn, to grow, to change, to take risks and to take action. Basically, they’re willing to do whatever it takes.
But maybe you’re thinking, it’s too late. That you’re not in love anymore and that you don’t think you can fall back in love with your partner. It’s this very belief that may be getting in your way.
I’m here to tell you that it’s normal to fall out
and back in love again in a long-term marriage.
People who are married for a long time are not typically “in love” with their partner the whole time. They fall out and back in love again many times over the years.
You know that 80-year-old couple that’s dancing at the wedding who clearly adore each other and still look madly in love. Well, those people will tell you that they were not madly in love every day for the last 60 years. In fact, there were many times when they wanted to toss their partner out of a window. We all want to be that 80-year-old couple, right? We want people to say, “Wow, look at them, I want that kind of marriage.” Well, that couple will tell you that it took two things to get to that point...
Commitment and the willingness to work on the marriage.
Let me tell you about the mistake people make when considering whether to check back into their marriage. They believe they should wait until they feel “in love” again. In other words, they’re waiting to take any action to fix the marriage until they get the sensation that they want to fix the marriage and it’s the cart before the horse argument, isn’t it? Learning marriage success skills and working on your marriage leads to those loving feelings again. Did you see the movie Field of Dreams? Marriage is a lot like that - “build it and it will come.” Have faith. Trust the process. Learning these skills revitalizes your marriage and, therefore, allows you to fall back in love with the person you’re already married to.
Do you want to fix your marriage but your spouse isn’t willing to work on them with you?
Are you trying to save your marriage but your partner is checked out? Dr. Dana has a new solution that can help get your spouse checked back in and working with you on the relationship. Check out Dr. Dana’s solution to “Get Your Spouse Checked Back In.”
Save Your Marriage Today
Are you ready to take action and do what it takes to save your marriage?
To learn more about saving your marriage using our online videos and downloadable exercises, check out our StrongMarriageNow System.
Have you recognized any issues preventing you from working on your marriage? How can we help? Please comment below.
Dr. Dana Fillmore and Amy Barnhart, co-Founders, StrongMarriageNow.com