Life can be stressful, as we all know too well. It seems like everyday holds a mountain of chores, odds and ends, and ultimately, unfinished business. Whether it’s something unforeseen with the kids, a long day at work, or simply not enough hours in the day, checking everything off of a day’s “to do list” is almost impossible. There is always more to do.
While there’s no getting around it, married couples can make an effort to combat the never-ending to do list, and in doing so, reduce the stress the list can create.
It’s less about getting everything done, and more about getting things done FOR your spouse. Simply asking, “is there anything I can do for you?” can go a long way. The idea is to complete small tasks so your spouse doesn’t have to – you are acting out of kindness and love for your husband or wife, using your time to lighten their workload. If you are both doing this, everybody gets more done!
In many cases, you don’t even need to ask your spouse if there is anything you can do. Chances are, you’re well aware of what needs to be done, or more specifically, the tasks your spouse has been putting off.
Performing little favors for your spouse is ultimately a gesture of affection, and can become a habit that improves the quality of your marriage every single day. It is a reason to appreciate the other person, to be thankful for their presence in your life, as well as a great way to stay on top of the seemingly insurmountable pile of things to take care of.
It doesn’t matter how minor the favor is, either. The motivation is the important part, because it is a tangible display of putting your spouse’s needs first. Anything from holding a door open to doing the dishes, running to the store to watering the plants, if it eases a burden for your spouse, it is worth doing. As this practice becomes habit, your appreciation for one another is bound to grow, and you will find you do things for each other without even thinking about it!
Marriage needs to be a team effort, and teammates watch each other’s backs. They use their strengths to cover each other’s weaknesses, and triumph as a unit. You and your spouse can literally support one another simply by volunteering to help, to get something done so the other doesn’t have to.
This is more than just a tip for getting more done around the house, or a way to make your spouse appreciate you more. The idea of constant “small favors” is a way to look at your entire relationship, a frame of mind that puts that will keep the two of you connected, appreciative of each other’s abilities and strengths, and as a fortunate side effect, you’ll probably get more checked of the do to list too.
These random acts of kindness will go along way toward showing your spouse your love.
For more tips on how to strengthen your marriage, check out the StrongMarriageNow System today!
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Dr. Dana Fillmore and Amy Barnhart, co-Founders, StrongMarriageNow.com