How To Stop The Divorce

And Save Your Marriage

Joe wrote in and asked Dr. Dana “How Do I Stop My Divorce?” Dr. Dana answer’s Joe’s question in the video below. Are you trying to save your marriage? This video will tell you that there is hope and give you some clear steps you can take to get your marriage back on track.

And Save Your Marriage

Want more help from Dr. Dana to stop your divorce?

For more advice on how to strengthen your marriage, check out the Strong Marriage Now System link below!

Related Posts

How We Help

As seen on Our Most Popular Program Strong Marriage Now System 2.0 An innovative alternative to in person counseling done completely online that will help you get your marriage back on track. Your System Includes: The Checked Out Partner Solution Do you want to: Get your Spouse Checked Back In to Your Marriage Stop the […]

Stop Divorce and Separation

Are you trying to stop your divorce or separation and save your marriage? Does your spouse want out and you’re not sure what to do? Are you afraid your marriage is over? It is possible to stop the divorce and save your marriage even if your spouse isn’t willing to try but you must handle […]

No Matter How Long You’ve Been Married, Sex Matters!

Physical intimacy is a critical part of a romantic relationship. The fact is, biology plays a huge role in our love lives. Sex (and other forms of intimacy) is the difference between friends and lovers, and when our bodies feel connected, so do our hearts and minds! There’s a misconception that sex becomes less important […]

Will Divorce Really Harm Your Kids?

Divorce can wreak havoc on many parts of life. It’s expensive and time consuming, can drag up painful memories, cause bitter confrontation, bring about financial ruin, damage friendships, and of course, lead to chaos and confusion in the lives of the children whose parents are splitting. But just how severely are these kids affected? We […]

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

94 comments

Francis Kuhn 9 years ago

Very good information,,,thanks. My big question is: My wife left me in 2005 to go to spend time with our Daughter in another part of the world. She came back in 2009. +- 3 weeks later she left me. She is still totally determined to get a divorce. She is living far away from me. We both are in Ireland. We are still on speaking terms. With all of my heart I want to save our Marriage. Im 59 and she is 60. What can I do to change the situation to one of real hope?

Jim Webster 9 years ago

That sounds so much like what were going through?. She has "checked out" but I want so much to save our marriage. She says we been through this and I don't listen. Now there is another man involved. She said she has feelings for him. I want so bad to save our marriage. We have 4 kids 3 of which we had together. Our 14 year old I have raised with her since he was 2. Even he has been telling his mom to work things out and stay. Any suggestions?

j 9 years ago

my husbands brother passed away and now all of a sudden he wants a divorce?i mean bring up every fault i have ever had you name it doesnt want to say he loves me . i want to save my marriage we have been together for about 21 years can you help

Annie 9 years ago

I am terrified my husband had checked out. we are in counciing together but once we walk out of the office, he acts like we were never there. He threatens to leave if we can't get it together by Dec 2013 (2 months) away. wev'e been in therapy since April 8 mths. we have 4 boys and there is a possibility there was infidelity early on, What do I do? we have been together for 20 years.

Mike_Olsen_SMN 9 years ago

Annie, communication breakdown can be very hurtful in a marriage. Does it seem like your spouse is not committed anymore? There are ways that you can get your spouse to recommit.. https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/save-marriage-spouse-recommit-marriage/.

JD 9 years ago

I've moved out but still spend time with my wife and kids. She wants a divorce and tells me it's to late for me to work on our marriage. I want to be a family again, any advice?

Mike_Olsen_SMN 9 years ago

JD, Please check out our video to learn ways to stop the divorce and save your marriage, even if your partner doesn't seem interested. https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/how-to-stop-the-divorce-and-save-your-marriage/

Gen c 9 years ago

I have been married for over 11 years. the beginning of October he said he just cousins do this anymore. so I freaked out and pleaded with him through text messages, and I said some thing I'm not proud of. at the end of October he finally called me but it was about how to get banned off of bills and such. then a couple of days after that he called me and we talked about some things and that he had filed for divorce. I tried to take it well. then we got into why he said that he tried everything abd I said no he didn't and I didn't have a clue. I told him even with that that I was not going to sign the papers and was going to try my best at working on myself and communication. I don't know what to do but leave him alone to figure it out. he was so resentful of what I had done and I'm at a loss but hopeful. please help.

Mike_Olsen_SMN 9 years ago

Gen, It is good to hear that you want to work on your communication. This video has great tips on communicating with your spouse: https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/communication-in-marriage/#comm-video

nicole 9 years ago

Hi my husband and i have trust issues and i dont thonk its good to be with someone i dont trust. I wsnt to get help but wr have not enough money. I want out. We have lots of other issues to thay i just don't want to deal with. What do i do to leave.

Mike_Olsen_SMN 9 years ago

Nicole, Trust is difficult to rebuild, but it can be done. Here is a terrific video on how to do so: https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/important-problem/trust-yt/

Tim 8 years ago

Our marriage has been up and down from almost the start. It is both of our second marriage and we have both have kids from previous marriages. I do love her and sure she still loves me but the constant fighting has taken its toll, there is also underlying trust issues in the relationship. She has moved out and into her own place just within the last week, I am telling her we can fix this but she is saying it is to late and asking me why now? Why now am I concerned or wanting to try and fix this? I honestly don't think either one of us wants this but how do I get my wife to see that it isn't to late?

Mike_Olsen_SMN 8 years ago

Tim, Are the issues you are fighting about due to your blended family? If so, please check out this video on dealing with blended family issues. https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/marriage-counseling-advice-deal-blended-family-issues-fighting/

Horace 8 years ago

hey JD & I are going thru the same things. I wanna know is there a way I could save my marriage. I love my wife very much but she's always asking fir a divorce, what shall I do?

Jerome 8 years ago

my wife & I have been married only for 11 months & we have trust issues on top of other issues. she wants to call it quits already. we have one beautiful daughter together. what do I need to do to save my marriage?

Mike_Olsen_SMN 8 years ago

Horace, I would communicate as much as possible. That way you both know what each other are going through and feeling. Here is a great video on improving the communication in your marriage: https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/communication-in-marriage/#comm-video

Mike_Olsen_SMN 8 years ago

Jerome, It sounds like the two of you need to work on regaining trust with each other. Here is a very helpful video for you: https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/important-problem/trust-yt/

Faith 8 years ago

My husband has been cheating for 3 yrs that i know of and i had divorce papers served on him but i'm still not sure if that is what i want to do, he wants reconciliation, But i have this fear that he will do it again i have started to see a therapist

Mike_Olsen_SMN 8 years ago

Faith, Please check out this video,"7 Steps to Survive an Affair." Hopefully this video will give you some guidance. https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/7-steps-to-survive-an-affair/

roger 8 years ago

my wifes friends are poisioning are marriage always telling my wife I am cheating but its really not true.i just found out recently my wife has cheated on me but I still love her and I don't want to throw 9 years away.she accuses me but she is the one doing it.how can I save my marriage for my kids sake?

Mike_Olsen_SMN 8 years ago

Roger, It sounds like you are both facing trust issues. Please take a look at this video on "How to Regain Trust After It's Been Destroyed."

brad 8 years ago

Me and my wife are separated for about 9 months now, She told me that she was not happy and that she need some space. now I love my wife and my daughter I have been trying to save my marriage from the day we got married. on the 1/1/2014 I called her and ask what was going to happen with the relationship basically I was just wondering if she was ready to get back together and she told me that right now she was not thinking about relationship, she was thinking about her school and her career and other things I was feeling sad but I went down on my knees and pray to god then the pain went away, but what I was wondering is what do you think about my situation please I just want my wife back in my life I want my family.

Mike_Olsen_SMN 8 years ago

Brad, It sounds like the two of you need to work on reconnecting as a couple. Here is a video with helpful insight on how to do that! https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/reconnect-feel-close/

Darren 8 years ago

My wife has filed for divorce and I have moved out I want to save our marriage but I am totally at a loss of where to begin she is having an affair and we've both had protective orders put on each other it's such a. Mess what can I do

Mike_Olsen_SMN 8 years ago

Darren, Here is a video for you to view: "How To Survive an Affair." https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/survive-affair-infidelity-in-marriage/

DJ 8 years ago

My wife has checked out of our marriage. She says she has been slipping away for many years now and has no "in love" feelings for me. SHe began to lose respect when I lost my job several years ago. I have a hard time dealing with it , but found a job within 3 months. She gave me no support, only pushed me to look harder. She now has made contact with an old boyfriend,who is also married, and they have been communicating daily. I wish to save my 18 years of marriage , but she will not seek help with me and says she can never feel that way about me again.

Mike_Olsen_SMN 8 years ago

DJ, I am sorry that your wife is communicating with an old boyfriend; that can't be easy for you. Here is an article I think you should read: https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/ed-asks-my-wife-is-having-an-affair-and-she-wont-stop-seeing-him/

valerie 8 years ago

My husband and I are just too different and that we have nothing in common. I feel like were drifting and every little argument turns into a war. I don't know how much more I can take until I check out..

Mike_Olsen_SMN 8 years ago

Valerie, I am very sorry to hear that every little argument is turning into a war between you and your husband, that is very frustrating. Here is a great article on "How to Keep the Small Stuff Small." https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/marriage-advice-small-stuff-small/

Erika Shuler 8 years ago

How can save my marriage he has moved out

Mike_Olsen_SMN 8 years ago

Erika, Keep in mind it is possible to save a marriage even if your partner seems uninterested or has checked out. Take a look at this article for more information: https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/can-you-save-your-marriage-even-if-your-partner-doesnt-want-to-work-on-it/

amber 8 years ago

I have been married for 15 years and im 32 and we have 3 children together my husband always says he is going to do something whether its fixing our house or going somewhere but he never does he dont want to spend any quality time together and when I tell him how I feel he gets mad and turns the table we hardly ever sleep in the same bed anymore n I feel more like roommates then husband and wife im currently going back to school to get my nurses degree and he is supportive he says he is but when I tell him I have a big test or when I'm doing my homework he invites company over and when I stay in my room studying he calls antisocial I am at my witts end but I love him but im lost what can I do

Mike_Olsen_SMN 8 years ago

Amber, You must be very busy as a mom, a wife, and a student! It would be a good idea for you and your husband to find some time to reconnect and remember why the two of you fell in love in the first place! Here is a helpful video: https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/reconnect-feel-close/

please_help 8 years ago

Hi, My parents are getting a divorce and, I don't know what to do. What should I tell then. Is it too late?

XJW 8 years ago

I have seriously question l... Me and my hubby are from different culture, we were together for 5years and had amazing wedding two years ago.. We both are 25, he is an American and I am from China, well we start have problem few months ago that he told me he doesn't feel connected with me anymore, he admitted that I am the best wife that he could ever ask for which is true I treat him like a price because I love him so much, so every time after he came back from traveling and spend some time with his sister, his mind totally changed, like takes almost quite long time to become close and sweet again, now he does admit that he is not sure if he is ready for the marriage , which I can understand because he is only 25, then he told me he loves me very much however he doesn't in love with me... Relation ship takes two people to work, and he said he can't see the future with me together because in order to make our relation ship work, we keep compromising to each other that most people might think is totally normal, also out relationship is like satisfy but what he looking for is a fulfill relation ship, I do whatever I can and takes to save thing relation ship, however, I am thinking if I should just give me because I love him, I want him to be happy and owns his freedom back again.. That's the best I can do, but it's very hard to imagine life without him, it breaks my heart! We were the best couple ever and I was so happy to do anything for him. Please help me!!!!!!!!!

Mike_Olsen_SMN 8 years ago

Please_help, Be sure to talk to both of your parents about whatever feelings you are experiencing. Keeping the communication lines open in your family should be very helpful to everyone in this situation.

Mike_Olsen_SMN 8 years ago

XJW, The relationship does not have to be over. It is possible to save the marriage when one person is checked out of the relationship. Please watch this video: https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/how-to-save-your-marriage/get-husband-wife-checked-back-marriage/. I think you will find this very helpful.

XJW 8 years ago

Thank you , watched the video and I understood, however this is not so detail tho, we both are still together and still have amazing sex together even better than before, however, still not changing the fact that we are separating ....I think it's very hard to save the marriage right.. Coz he just 25... And he doesn't think he is ready for the marriage !! How come 2years marriage such so hard?!

LG2292 8 years ago

My husband and I have only been married 9 months and he has completely changed in a bad way.. I mentioned the D word to him about 1 month ago.. but it seems some of the things I told him I wasnt happy with he is doing more often.. almost twice as much.. I told him again last night how I felt.. I dont want a divorce but I cant keep putting my all in and there be no affection, or concideration.. what do I do??

Mike_Olsen_SMN 8 years ago

LG2292, Is it possible the two of you just need to get your marriage "unstuck?" Now that you are moving out of the "honeymoon" stage and having to deal with real life situations maybe the two of you need to set some time aside for each other! Here are some great ways to reconnect: https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/ways-fall-love/

Sarah 8 years ago

I am married to my husband 5 years now and got a two year old son together. Sadly, after a terrible argument and years of issues not dealt, I got frustrated and told him to go if he don't want to be here and be committed to family. After our son was born, he has spent very little quality time with family and turns the table on me if I say that he needs too. He totally disregards the need to spend time with family and will spend hours with friends. He keeps close contact with X's and allow family to have a say in everything in the marriage. Off course this gets me upset and I usually get silent, say hurtful words and withdraw myself for long periods. He makes decisions and am totally kept in the dark and would take our marriage problems to family members. This has driven a wedge between us and cause me to say a lot of terrible hurtful but true things to him. I know my methods were totally wrong and did more harm than good, but I was totally frustrated. I don't want us to get a divorce, but it seems like we will cause he says he is not returning. should I just walk away form this or should I try to save my marriage. I have apologized many times, discussed the importance of dealing with our issues and importance of our vows and being committed despite our mistakes. What is the best advice you can give here?

Mike_Olsen_SMN 8 years ago

Sarah, Although he may have left, it is still possible to save your marriage! The two of you may need to spend some time reconnecting and recommitting to the marriage. Please take a moment to watch this video: https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/save-marriage-spouse-recommit-marriage/

mj 8 years ago

My husband said he wants a divorce. He sleeps in another room, he does stuff by binary. Snd gets mad if I go with my frost, kids or alone. I am always alone. He brings up my part before he was even in my life and believes it. Be won't talk to me he says shut the fuck up or your yelling. And u sm not. But I am good enough to buy dinner , work on his car, motorcycle, watch his dog, fix the interest for hi But iI am not good enough to be in his life. Help me please.

mj 8 years ago

I will try anything

Warren 8 years ago

hello

Mike_Olsen_SMN 8 years ago

Hello, Warren. I responded to your previous comment. Was there something else you'd like to ask?

Warren 8 years ago

Yes mike I wanted to let u know that there was not alcohol involved How do I help my wife recover and help understand that I'm a changed man We've been together for 22yrs and there is no pattern it was a short period of time that it happened in I'm not this person and I have been in such pain, embarrassed and totally regretful I need to save my marriage and reassure my wife I'm committed to her and only her Please help

Mike_Olsen_SMN 8 years ago

No, Warren, I didn’t think there was alcohol, but the destructive behavior and the path of reconciliation can be the same. It may not have been over years, but you can help her work through her feelings and show her you’re a different person. https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/marriage-counseling-years-disappointment/

chris 8 years ago

how do you save a marriage when she has moved out with friends and they are showing her how fun the single life can be and there may be some one else in her life

chris 8 years ago

anyone?

Mike_Olsen_SMN 8 years ago

Hi, Chris! Don't worry, we're here. It can certainly be hard to save a marriage on your own. We do have a section in our blog dedicated to helping you save your marriage on your own. Here is a particularly helpful video. https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/how-to-save-your-marriage/get-husband-wife-checked-back-marriage/

Hopeless 8 years ago

My husband for all 3 years of our marriage has lied over and over about another women he works with and has spent time with her at work trips without me and chooses her over me with insults and meanness towards me. One year of Christian counseling and an 8 week class of saving marriage at church and it just happened again. Is a wife just supposed to keep taking thT and keep getting over it and all he says is the word sorry sometimes . Do you keep on ?

Nelly 8 years ago

My husband & I have only been married for four months going on five months , just this passed Sunday I told him I wanted a divorce because of a conversation him and his ex girlfriend were having . It really hurt me seeing it .. Then there's his bestfriends constantly so called joking about him not talking to them all the time anymore and getting jealous and stuff . I've told him how much it bothered me but he never told them to stop or anything they all thought it was funny . I know I'm the one that said the "D" word but I don't want to go on with it anymore and I'm trying to fix that now but he doesn't want to hear it . We are expecting our little boy August 13th sometime after that he said he may file for divorce now since I changed my mind. Please help me I told myself I wouldn't give up but it's getting harder I'm running out of options and choices

Mike_Olsen_SMN 8 years ago

Hello, Hopeless - There are times when we, even as pro-marriage people, think separation is a viable option - https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/separation-viable-option/. Only you can make that call. If you want to work on your marriage, we believe that is an option as well, and we always try to encourage both partners working together. We have several articles related to infidelity that might help you. https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/survive-affair-infidelity-in-marriage/

Mike_Olsen_SMN 8 years ago

Hi, Nelly - You both chose each other over all others, and if you want to make it work, we believe you can. https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/save-marriage-spouse-recommit-marriage/

Marilyn Kennedy 8 years ago

If we asked a question under guest login in, do we get an answer sent to our email??? Thank you for what you Do!

Help us 8 years ago

How do I save my marriage of 30 years when he's having an affair and doesn't want the marriage.

Mike_Olsen_SMN 8 years ago

Yes, you should, Marilyn, and thank you!

Mike_Olsen_SMN 8 years ago

This video focuses on a woman, but the points are the same. I hope you can watch and find a way to save your marriage if that is what you choose - https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/ed-asks-my-wife-is-having-an-affair-and-she-wont-stop-seeing-him/

Joe 8 years ago

I have have been married to my beautiful wife for 4 years now and we have been through a very rough roller coaster. In the beginning, it was great. But over the years we started getting into very heated arguments and I would say things that hurt her a lot. These past few months however, we were getting better at getting along and we hadn't gotten into anything serious for a while and I was starting to fall in love with her again. But a few days ago we got into a huge argument. I said some mean things like I usually do that hurt her and she then revealed to me that she had filed for divorce days ago after a little argument we had then and forced me to leave. Now she will not conversate with me AT ALL and every time I try, she threatens to get a restraining order against me and knowing her, she'll actually do it. She already has a lawyer and according to her, she already filed and is in the talks with them and I can probably expect papers soon. I so desperately don't want this marriage to end. I love her so dearly and I'm willing to do just about anything to stop it and save my marriage. I need help FAST! Any advice will help.

Mike_Olsen_SMN 8 years ago

Hi, Joe - that does sound like a pretty serious situation. Everyone will reach their breaking point. It sounds like you need to talk with someone in order to stop that negative behavior when you're angry. Try writing her a letter. https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/save-marriage-spouse-wont-talk/

Tara 8 years ago

I need advice, my husband and I of 20 yrs are separated and he has or had another relationship which he says it over. however, i don't believe him.he is on a dating website. he was caught but, still seems to think a divorce would be best for us. I want my marriage more then anything i watched alot of the videos on here and feel like im competing for something that is already Mine. im lost and dont know what to do anymore. one minute it seems to be getting better then he pulls the old MIA card in me. any advise?

Mike_Olsen_SMN 8 years ago

Hi, Tara - You can work on it even if you are alone - https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/save-marriage-possible/ - and there are ways to get past the infidelity - https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/7-steps-to-survive-an-affair/ - but if you've tried everything and he is unable to to recommit, if make be time to end it. https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/save-marriage-time-call-quits/ I hope you both are able to reconcile, and even more, I hope you both are happy.

Pat 7 years ago

Can a marriage be saved after my husband has had an on & off affair for years. How will I know when I should just give up. I love my husband & want my family together. I feel like my husband is very confused. He is back & forth from our home to his moms. It's only been a month but seems forever. We are still intimate & sleep I'm the same bed when he is home but I know he is still texting & talking to the other women who is chasing him. Sometimes I feel like I should not call or text and not let him know how much I want this work. Should I just give him his space? Should I not tell him I want him to come home & that I love him? I don't want him to think I don't care. We have two children & they want their dad home all the time. Sometimes I feel if he was truly done that he wouldn't come home to stay some nights or wouldn't have anything to do with me or wouldn't care if I knew about the other women. But that's not the case. It's not at all honest when it comes to her. Us that because he isn't sure if what he wants? His actions are so confusing because when he is home we interact & go places as a family. Does his behavior seem like he for sure knows what he wants? I over analyze everything so I need advice because I don't want to push him away. Please help and pray Thanks Pat

Pat 7 years ago

Anyone??

Mike_Olsen_SMN 7 years ago

Hi Pat - Right now, he has the best of both worlds, and he needs to decide. You can only do so much. https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/ed-asks-my-wife-is-having-an-affair-and-she-wont-stop-seeing-him/

heartbreak 7 years ago

I've been doing it on my own for years I am tired of the careless acts that cause deep pain being a pastor gives u no right to treat your family like crap

bob 7 years ago

Married for 9.75 years and together for 14. We had our first major fight to the point i yelled to get away and give me space. She refused and kept insulting and harassing to the point my anger took over and i pushed her and yelled to go away i don't want to argue leave me alone. 5 days later she filed a pfa and i was banned from the home and my 2 beautiful kids 8 and 2 yrs old. 2 weeks went to the trial and now i can see the kids but not talk or communicate with my wife. She still wont talk 80 days into the 90 day pfa. I filed for divorce but still not sure if the marriage is worth saving. how do i save this marriage?

bob 7 years ago

New Post....Any answers???

Mike_Olsen_SMN 7 years ago

Hi Bob - I'm sorry I've missed this. It's hard to say the right path now. Certainly don't even think about calling until the PFA has ended. At that point, I would send her a letter. Let her know what you are doing to be a better husband. Don't grovel or beg, she needs to see you are a changed man. https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/discover-stop-anger/

Mike_Olsen_SMN 7 years ago

Hi Heartbreak- You are right that a profession doesn't give anyone an excuse. https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/resolving-conflict-fighting-fair-marriage/stop-fighting/

Herman Bell 7 years ago

Hi my name is hope. I love my husband but I left and move to another state, my husband is in a new marriage I'm the new wife. I have been with my husband for 15 yrs I give up my housing to help him keep his, sent then he has been a asshole. The agreement was to save the house the rent it out and to go get another house, well that didn't happen and now his grow children men's come over don't speak they have keys to the house my husband don't thank nothing is wrong with that and the ex family he talks to them more then he talks to me and I'm the wife and I'm tied so I left and give him what he wanted.

Mike_Olsen_SMN 7 years ago

Hi Hope - You and your husband need to be a unit. You both need to agree on the rules of who has keys and who comes over, and what the plans are for your real estate and financials. https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/marriage-counseling-advice-deal-blended-family-issues-fighting/

Missy 7 years ago

My husband and I have been having the same arguments on and off for several months/years. It's about him not feeling appreciated. He's told me his needs are not being met sexually. Another thing that comes up is disciplining my oldest daughter (13). I'm consider myself a strict parent but I think sometimes he goes overboard not realizing that she is a kid. In the past we have tried talking about it and I get it. I tell myself I'm going to try harder to make him feel loved and appreciated. It goes well for a while but then I don't know what happens. I think I'm doing all the right things and it turns out he's feeling the same way again. He told me he's tired of this and he wants a divorce. He told me he went to see a lawyer. How do I get him to give me another chance? What can I say or do to make sure it's different this time. I don't know how to fix this permanently. It's not an issue about not being attracted to him or not enjoying intimacy with him. That's what's so hard for me to understand. I'm deeply in love with my husband. How can I convince him to give us another chance. That it will be different this time. How do do this when I myself don't have a plan.

Mike_Olsen_SMN 7 years ago

Hi Missy, I think you both need to see a therapist together. It sounds like you are not talking in the way that he hears. Have you both looked in to your love languages? https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/marriage-advice-understanding-differences-communication-styles/

Tina 7 years ago

I have been married for 18 years. My husband is having a mid-life crises. One day he just declared he does not love me and wants a divorce. He has moved out. What suggestion do you have

Mike_Olsen_SMN 7 years ago

Hi Tina, unfortunately that is fairly common. We have some specific advice - https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/midlife-crisis-threatening-marriage/

Dina 7 years ago

I have a question for you I had I had an affair and after four months my husband found out we went to marriage counseling for a couple months everything was great but he kept digging and trying to find I have a question for you I had I had an affair and after four months my husband found out we went to marriage counseling for a couple months everything was great but he kept digging and trying to findmore things to get mad at me about I've attempted suicide three times the last I was hospitalized for one week because I just couldn't take the hurting I had caused him and my family came out of the hospital and he's filing for divorce More things to get mad at me about I've attempted suicide three times the last I was hospitalized for one week because I just couldn't take the hurting I had caused him and my family came out of the hospital and he's filing for divorce It's been 5 months and we had sex 4 times. I want to make it work. He says he doesn't have to give me anymore chances. The chances he gave were the ones when he found something else out. In the hospital i realized what an ass I was. My husband is hurt and I want to stop this divorce. Please help me

Darliedew 7 years ago

Hello, I am seeking divorce from my husband. We have been together 9 years, married 4. Our marriage is constant bickering, constant arguing, sometimes getting physical, always mentally abusive. Should I press forward with divorce or is there any hope?

Mike_Olsen_SMN 7 years ago

Hi Darlie, we are pro marriage but we are pro happy marriage. We can't recommend staying in an abusive relationship. We have advice for ending the constant fight - https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/how-to-stop-the-fighting-and-the-pain/- but we cannot recommend anything if he is being abusive.

Mike_Olsen_SMN 7 years ago

Hi Dina, unfortunately you cannot stop your husband's pain and gain his trust over night. He is understandable hurt at your actions, but you can work to make them right. Instead of just telling him you want to change, show him. Be more transparent with your communication, be involved with him. Start a new activity together, bring something new to the bedroom (if he is willing). Go to counseling yourself and together. Please get the help you need regardless of your husband. Your life is not defined by him, and you can be happy. https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/7-steps-to-survive-an-affair/

Sabrina 7 years ago

My husband filed for divorce two weeks ago. He says he is not in love with me anymore. He has been moved out for about three months. I am trying everything I can to save our marriage and to stop the divorce but I am not sure what to do anymore. He knows how I feel. Last week we got into an argument and he is basically putting all the blame of this on me. I told him I can't go back and change the past. All I can do is say I am sorry and learn from my mistakes. I am going to counseling trying to figure out from her where this all went wrong and to work on myself so it does not happen again. Basically my husband thinks I quit making him a priority. I have asked numerous times and my husband will not budge on trying to stop the divorce. Is there anything else I can do or should I just accept that in a few months we will be divorced? We have been married for 12 years.

Mike_Olsen_SMN 7 years ago

Hi again, Sabrina. As I said before, I think counseling is a good step but it's important to remember he did not make this decision to divorce overnight, and it won't be fixed overnight either. He might not feel like a priority anymore, but you can show him that he still is. If he doesn't want to talk, try writing a letter. https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/reconnect-feel-close/

Sabrina 7 years ago

We are on cordial terms for talking....have basically been since he left. We have two kids together so we are trying to stay cordial with each other for us and for them. One of the biggest issues is my husband says once his mind is made up that is that. He says there is no changing his mind. Basically when he knows what he wants it is what he wants. How do I try to show him that he is a priority when basically it has become with him that he does not care anymore. He even says that he does not care anymore. I am pretty sure nothin is going to change him mind regardless of how much I work on myself and try to become better.

Mike_Olsen_SMN 7 years ago

Hi Sabrina, nothing is for sure, but think about how you both showed affection when you first started your relationship. https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/feel-alone-in-your-marriage-reconnect-with-your-partner-using-dr-dana%E2%80%99s-ground-rules/

rishi 7 years ago

Hi my name is Rishi I have been married for 16 years we start to have problems about two years ago when my wife get a new job and hang out with bad company she said that I s was not given her attention and I started Check her phone she was talking to a guy I confronted her about it she said it was just a friend but she stop talking to the guy but I got over protective and jealous we work things out but last year August after we came back from vacation she she change and she said she wanted to force that she fell out of love with me and it's not going to work we have 3 kids I do not want a divorce I want to save my marriage but since then she stopped talking to me we haven't been husband and wife for a couple of months she ignores me when she talks to me she talks to me with a mean voice and every weekend she goes out so how do I fix this. My email is rishi.gobin@aol.com please I need your help.

Mike_Olsen_SMN 7 years ago

Hi Rishi, it sounds like there are a lot of things going on. She may be going through a midlife crisis, or she may just feel like she isn't connected to you anymore. https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/reconnect-feel-close/

Robert 7 years ago

Hey I've been married for three years now and my wife is wanting a divorce because I took other people's advice on how to deal with our arguments!! An they told me to just let her calm down and everything would be ok! So I did as they said for 2 years I just let her cool off an didn't do anything, instead of doing what I should have been doing from the get go an changing what she was saying that she needed from me in this marriage! Is there anyway to save my marriage I don't want a divorce she is the love of my life?? Or did I mess up by not doing something for so long that there is no help?

Mike_Olsen_SMN 7 years ago

Hi Robert - There is no time like now to show her that you want to change your ways. You have to understand that Rome wasn't built in a day and your marriage won't be remade in one either. Give her time, but let her know that you want to work with her on fixing your marriage. https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/feel-wife-slipping-away-dr-dana-here/

Michael 6 years ago

Hi I've been married for three years and this past February we separated and during the separation period I've found myself so in love with my wife and she's still wanting the divorce and says that she is happy being alone and we have a two year old daughter who always says daddy kiss mommy or here talk to mommy. I love them both sincerely and I want to know how can i rebuild or rekindle a marriage in what my wife says it's over because she's not in love with me But she does love me. I've been depressed knowing she's possibly falling for someone else and we are married still. Can someone help me help us?

darlene 6 years ago

my husband filed for divorce and i got papers on my anniversary im so depressed and crying all the time i need help

Steve K 6 years ago

Hi. Been married 11 years with 2 girls..7 and 9 yo. My wife and I grew apart last few years with the everyday stresses of work and kids. Our communication diminished and I was not providing her what she needed emotionally. I recently found out she has another male emotional friend that she confides in. I approached her and she admitted to flirting and spending time with him on the phone. No physical contact was yet involved (as I was told). I am now looking to regain her love and rebuild our marriage but feel it may be too late. I was unaware that our marriage was so poor and take some blame for her emotional affair. I am considering calling the other man since I know him professionally. He is married for the 2nd time and has a young child and a pregnant wife. My fears are that my wife does not want to reconcile and rebuild. Need advice...should I give her space? I don't want to hound her but I feel majorly betrayed when she had the "affair". I am trying to fulfill her emotional needs but I hope its not too late

Denise Margaret 6 years ago

I have been rejected by my husband all time i have always tried to stay friendly over again after our divorce which occurred in early November 2015 last year After three years of marriage just because a different woman had a spell on him and he left me and the kid to suffer. I was really worried and hopeless, so i met with this spell caster Lord Vasikar on the Internet after a long search. And he told me what i needed to do, and he also assured me that he is going to reunite us in just 24 hours later after his spell casting. So he started his work on Monday 21th December. I neither did not believe my eyes. He is back!!! Yes, he really came back in 24 hours just as you guaranteed Sir. Now I'm fully persuaded that you are a legit and authentic spell caster and your website is the best i have ever come across. This is so mind-boggling for me. Westcott is back!!! I haven't by any means experienced something like this before. Thank you so much Lord Vasikar. I never expected such a result. Dream comes true. Wow! You were so kind with me. "And may your kindness float back to you like ripples that float back to sea shore". Thank you sir for your precious help. I never believe that I will Celebrate Xmas with my husband, I have never been so happy in my life like the way i am today. You are a genuine spirit. You and your work will never be forgotten for making me a fulfilled woman and reuniting me and my ex husband once again. You are my hero.. The kids are overjoyed to have their father come back home for good. Sir here i am sharing your testimony just as i promised. Here is his website: https://experiencespelltemple.webs.com/ and also his Email: experiencespelltemple@outlook.com. Thank you so much sir from your grateful client Denise Margaret.

alicerennie1 6 years ago

My Name is Cowee Chrystal.I will love to share my testimony to all the people in the forum cos i never thought i will have my girlfriend back and she means so much to me..The girl i want to get marry to left me 4 weeks to our wedding for another man..,When i called her she never picked my calls,She deleted me on her facebook and she changed her facebook status from engage to Single…when i went to her place of work she told her boss she never want to see me..I lost my job as a result of this cos i cant get myself anymore,my life was upside down and everything did not go smooth with my life…I tried all i could do to have her back to all did not work out until i met a Man when i Travel to Africa to execute some business have been developing some years back..I told him my problem and all have passed through in getting her back and how i lost my job…he told me he gonna help me…i don’t believe that in the first place.but he swore he will help me out and he told me the reason why my girlfriend left me and also told me some hidden secrets.i was amazed when i heard that from him..he said he will cast a spell for me and i will see the results in the next couple of days..then i travel back to Germany the following day and i called him when i got home and he said he’s busy casting those spells and he has bought all the materials needed for the spells,he said am gonna see positive results in the next 2 days that is Thursday.My girlfriend called me at exactly 12:35pm on Thursday and apologies for all she had done ..she said,she never knew what she’s doing and her sudden behavior was not intentional and she promised not to do that again.it was like am dreaming when i heard that from her and when we ended the call,i called the man and told him my my girl friend called and he said i haven’t seen anything yet… he said i will also get my job back in 3 days time..and when its Sunday,they called me at my place of work that i should resume work on Monday and they gonna compensate me for the time limit i have spent at home without working..My life is back into shape,i have my girlfriend back and we are happily married now with a baby boy and i have my job back too.This man is really powerful..if we have up to 20 people like him in the world,the world would have been a better place..he has also helped many of my friends to solve many problems and they are all happy now..Am posting this to the forum for anybody that is interested in meeting the man for help.you can mail him to prophet.abuvia@abv.bg I cant give out his number cos he told me he don’t want to be disturbed by many people across the world..he said his email is okay and he also have a web site if you want to visit him there’ he will replied to any emails asap..hope he helped u out too..good luck. his web site is https://prophetabuviasolutiontemple.webs.com/ his phone number is +254-7921-77506 Cowee Chrystal