How Sex Makes Your Husband Feel Connected

Men often get a bad rap when it comes to sex. The classic complaint is that “all he wants is sex,” or “every time he touches me, it’s just because he wants sex…”

While many men may have a more direct and “up front” sex drive than their wives, statements like those above overlook a major component of male psychology, and minimize his needs into something purely physical. It’s almost always incorrect, and always unfair.

Sex will make your husband feel more connected.
Sex will make your husband feel more connected.

The truth is, men DO desire sex in a more direct way than women most of the time, but it’s because physical intimacy is a critical part of feeling connected, in love, appreciated, and safe. Women often overlook this, and reduce their husbands’ advances to something selfish and just sexual. It’s not – he wants to connect with you!

Even as children, males tend to be very tactile – they interact with the world around them through touch and physicality. This is why so many boys rough house, and are calmed by parental back scratches (and the like). As they grow up and develop different needs, sex becomes a primary method of connection and expression for feelings of affection and romantic love.

So yes, he does want sex, but it’s not that simple. There are biological functions that make him express his affection and attraction in that way, and through physical intimacy, his psychological needs for connection and appreciation are fulfilled.

He may not be very good at expressing it (or even be consciously aware of it), but that’s exactly what’s going on his head.

The misunderstanding is largely a problem of communication. He’s not articulating the true nature of his needs, and she’s making an unfair assumption – as well as minimizing the depth of his needs.

Really, this is just something to keep in mind next time your roll your eyes and think, “he just wants to get laid.” There’s a lot more going on than that, and the more you understand what sex really means to him, the less likely you are to shrug it off as another “all he wants is sex” moment.

Even if he doesn’t express it directly, your husband has emotional needs, and because of the way he’s wired, some of those needs are met in a physical way. Don’t just brush off his advances as something purely physical…

He’s trying to connect!

For more advice on how to strengthen your marriage, check out the StrongMarriageNow System today!
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Dr. Dana Fillmore and Amy Barnhart, co-Founders, StrongMarriageNow.com

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6 comments

ronsword 6 years ago

I have been with my wife since my sophomore year in high school. We have both only been with each other. Our sex life has never been great, but it has steadily declined since we got married (we are 38, been married for 15 years). I have a very strong sex drive and obviously my wife does not. We are only having sex maybe once every other month. She is my best friend and we are very happy together, but the lack of sexual contact has bothered me for a long time.

ronsword 6 years ago

I have been with my wife since my sophomore year in high school. We have both only been with each other. Our sex life has never been great, but it has steadily declined since we got married (we are 38, been married for 15 years). I have a very strong sex drive and obviously my wife does not. We are only having sex maybe once every other month. She is my best friend and we are very happy together, but the lack of sexual contact has bothered me for a long time.

Mike_Olsen_SMN 6 years ago

I'm sorry you are going through that, here is an article that might help to rekindle the passion - https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/sexless-marriage-rekindle-passion/

Mike_Olsen_SMN 6 years ago

I'm sorry you are going through that, here is an article that might help to rekindle the passion - https://www.strongmarriagenow.com/sexless-marriage-rekindle-passion/

mary olwen 6 years ago

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mary olwen 6 years ago

Hello everyone, My name is Mary Olwen from Ohio,USA. I came to this site to share the good works of the online spell caster who reunited me with my husband and we are happily married now. I never believed in love, money spells or magic until i met this powerful spell caster when i went to Africa in December last year on a business trip. He is really powerful and he can help you cast spells to bring back your lover even when he or she is gone, well, the man i wanted to marry left me 2 weeks before our wedding day and my life was miserable because our relationship has been on for years ..I really loved him, but his ex fiancee was against us and she used vodoo to distract him and make him hate me. But when i met this spell caster Dr Michael Best, i narrated my ordeal to him and he assured me of reconciliation once i get back to the states. and right now we are happily married and expecting our little kid, and my husband now loves me more than he did before. Should you need his help you can reach him via the email below : myonlinelovespells@gmail.com.........................................