How do I choose a marriage counselor that's right for me and my husband?

There are some key questions that will help you determine who is the best therapist for you and your spouse.  

The first thing you need to check out is:  Are they a couples therapy expert? Not just do they have experience doing couples therapy, because almost every therapist will tell you that they do,  but do they consider couples counseling one of the things they specialize in and do they have at least 10 years of experience doing it.

couple in counseling

The next thing you need to consider is, are they compatible with both you and your spouse. For the most part you can determine this over the phone. Keep in mind, a lot of therapists believe that the way to save a marriage is to try to make the man become more like a woman.  But in fact, most men are more comfortable with a therapist that has a direct, respectful, and balanced approach. So if you walk into their office and the couches are pink and flowery, there’s new age music playing and lots of low lighting chances are your husband will quickly check out and it won't work.  

Next, lets talk about the cost.  Couples Counseling is an investment in your marriage and it takes time and money. But I tell people that couples therapy is like tuning-up your car, you won't fix it if you only change the spark plugs, there are a lot of other important parts that need time and attention.

Keep in mind, most insurance companies don’t cover couples counseling.  And a single couples therapy session can cost anywhere between $80 to $200 per hour.  So make sure you consider this when you’re choosing your couples therapist.

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Kimberly 6 years ago

Is this type of therapy for married couples covered by the VA?

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