Most families have a series of holiday traditions they practice, whether it’s lighting Hanukkah candles, Christmas Eve at grandma’s house, a special breakfast on Christmas morning, holiday games, going caroling, or anything else that brings a family together during the holiday season. These traditions build the strength of families, and create lasting memories for everyone involved. These family traditions can help define a unique family unit, and are often passed on through generations of children and grandchildren.

What about holiday traditions for couples, though? If the holidays are a time to celebrate love and connectedness, why not develop traditions for just the two of you?

Coordinating all of your holiday plans can be a pain, especially if you have kids and extended family to deal with. If you’ve got a part of the holiday routine set aside for just you and your spouse, it can be a great way to escape the fray for a little while, and as it becomes tradition over the years, you’ll only look forward to it more and more.

Of course, developing your own unique tradition is entirely up to you, and your options are virtually endless. It could be a single night of “escape” in a local hotel or a special dessert that only the two of you get to enjoy after the kids are all in bed. If you want to get even more involved, you can create a tradition surrounding the way you choose gifts for one another, be it in the form of a “just the two of us” shopping trip or a special type of “bonus gift” that you exchange every year.

To keep things interesting, try to make your special tradition a healthy mix of sweet and sexy – it is just for the two of you, after all! This could mean accompanying a special gift with a naughty note or recreating a particularly romantic evening from your past year after year. Let your imagination run wild! This tradition is for you and your spouse, no one else – so make it exactly how you want it to be. The point is to create something special that you can enjoy together, away from the other distractions that can accompany the holidays.

Whatever special plans you make, do your best to stick with it for a few years to come. Traditions gain their real power when they become second nature, when they are simply “what you do” every year. Like the other family traditions you’ve come to cherish, this special time you set aside for your marriage will be something you look forward to every year, and more importantly, something that stays with you long after the holidays are over.

What are your traditions? Please comment…

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Dr. Dana Fillmore and Amy Barnhart, co-Founders, StrongMarriageNow.com