Human beings are creatures of habit. We tend to get used to our conditions, whatever they may be, and come to expect them as the norm. Physical contact with your spouse is no different – your desire is directly tied to the amount of physical contact you engage in. In other words, the more you do it, the more you’ll want it!
Unfortunately, the opposite is also true – the less physical contact you make with your spouse, the less either of you will desire.
The solution is simple, then: touch each other more! If you and your spouse don’t seem to be touching as much as you’d like, as much as you think you should be, or you simply want to up the amount of affection in your life, make a point to cuddle up. You can take over your psychological desires through repeat action – and I know it works – by intentionally increasing the amount of physical contact you have with your spouse. Get in the habit of hugging and kissing when you part ways for the day, sit a little closer together on the couch, hold hands when you walk through the store together.
When you steer your brain in the right direction through increased and regular physical contact, other pieces of your relationship will improve. Solidifying a physical bond with your partner will only strengthen the emotional bonds you have.
Now take note here – I’m not talking about sex. While these behaviors will definitely help your desire to sneak off to the bedroom, you have to see this type of physical affection as an end in itself. Connecting physically is about more than what happens behind closed doors, and if your affectionate touches just become a precursor to sex, you are conditioning yourself to always expect it, and to not touch one another when you don’t want it to go that far. Instead, make a conscious effort to make physical contact a regular part of every day. Soon you’ll be reaching out to touch your spouse as they walk by, or find your hands intertwining under the dinner table in subconscious desire – you’ll do it without thinking about it.
With increased physical contact comes an increased desire to spend time with each other – not just together, but CLOSE together! It doesn’t have to be complicated, scheduled, or even worried much about. Just reach out and touch that special someone!
For more tips on how to strengthen your marriage, check out the StrongMarriageNow System today!
Wishing you a lifetime of love and happiness!
Dr. Dana and Amy